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Fauntleroy And Flossy – The Press Convention
Fauntleroy and Flossy – The Press Convention
Updated on January 14, 2017 mckbirdbks moreContact Creator “I am excited,” Fauntleroy said, trying in the mirror.
Flossy, mendacity on her huge brass mattress said, “Oh, really Darling You’ve got been avoiding press conferences. The press has talked about that you have been hiding from them.”
“Yeah, yeah, all that pretend information. We brainstormed it and figured out the way to handle those fools. I will likely be the first president-elect in historical past to deliver my lawyer to his press conflicts (not a typo.) I won’t be sworn in, thank goodness. And, I will probably be represented by a prime lawyer at a distinguished legislation agency. She is going to step in to make clear my enterprise positions. And you realize everybody trusts what legal professionals say. It’s sensible, I say, sensible. Why has no different President ever thought to deliver their attorneys to their press conferences Hey, I need a lawyer at all the cabinet conferences.”
Connie, who stood hidden in opposition to the wall, sporting a gown that matched the pattern of the room’s wallpaper, stepped away from the wall and stated, “I’ll see to it.”
Fauntleroy and Flossy checked out one another not realizing she was in the room.
“Hey,” Fauntleroy stopped her. “Find out the place these intelligence groups are getting their info. Someone is spying on us, and then leaking to the press. These faux-news-reporting-dishonest-individuals really bug me. Find out who could possibly be spying batman and batgirl couple shirts korea on us, with out us understanding.”
“I’ll see to it,” Connie spoke into her iPad recording app. She walked over to his dresser drawer and pulled out a set of inexperienced and yellow Lego® pieces and dumped them close to the financial institution of phones.
“What the hell are you doing ” Fauntleroy asked.
“You are going to go on Television and inform the American public you’re constructing a wall between you and your corporation curiosity.” She began assembling Lego® items. “This inexperienced telephone is your direct line of Mini-T and Errdick.” She began building the wall.
The Press Battle
“We are going to repeal and substitute. We’re going to placate and numerate. We are going to take credit whether credit score is due or not due. America is going to be great once more, because we were great as soon as. What’s all this speak about Russia Russia is a small little subject on the record of issues. Sure, they’ve nuclear weapons, but hey, so can we. We have now many extra weapons.”
“Ok, I’ll take a question.” Fauntleroy factors towards the crowd.
A voice calls out, “What do you say about the stories batman and batgirl couple shirts korea that during your journeys to Russia, the Russians have information that can and can be damaging to you and your administration ”
“Well, let me address that. During our many missionary missions to Russia to spread the Christian message we have been obtained effectively. We had large crowds, perhaps the biggest crowds ever seen in Russia. There is nothing in my private life that could not stand as much as the brightest spotlight. However that’s not why we’re here at present. I want to tell you that Ford goes to construct cars in Michigan. That’s great information for the great Michigonians. And boy oh boy, the Fiat-Chrysler people will likely be building cars in the nice state of Indiana. I feel that is Indiana, which is no strategy to be mistaken for Indians, as a result of Indians is of their title. I hope GM, additionally joins, in making cars in America once more; otherwise, they are going to be topic to a bolder border tax. And talking of being reimbursed for the wall, GM goes to have to construct good, and that i mean actually good, four wheel vehicles to get their cars over our wall. Subsequent query.”
@therealfauntleroy I’m the greatest job creator in the history of the world.
A voice calls out, “Are you listening to your intelligence company and the experiences they are bringing you And a observe up query, do you plan to sustain your public issues concerning their worth ”
“Really good query and I am glad you asked that query. Let me say, that I am going to be the best job creator within the historical past of job creators. The actual unemployment number is much greater than reported by the current keepers of the numbers. Close to ninety-six million persons are unemployed on this nation. I’m going to drive that number down, first by kicking out of the country a number of million individuals. And second, as soon as the dismantling of all the social promises made within the final sixty years and those safety nets taken away, all these individuals will rush to search out any work that this nice Federalist society chooses to supply.” He flashed a smile. “Either that or they will not eat. ”
Fauntleroy paused. “I am going to let my lawyer speak for a while. She won’t be taking questions, just presenting the knowledge that we advised her to current.”
When she was completed Fauntleroy took the podium, “Thank you everybody. We’re getting ready for a giant get together. We have now secured the most effective Army bands for all of the services. They had been ordered to play, and haven’t any right of refusal as all these proficient liberal folks. It will be an awesome get together. Then we might be all hung over throughout the weekend. Then that Monday we’ll get to work with our great work of constructing America great once more.”
It is a work of fiction. It’s a coincidence if there’s any resemblance to any nationally acclaimed con males. There are still tickets on sale for the good performance titled, Senate Confirmations. It is getting nice rankings in the media. If you are feeling overwhelmed by the avalanche of knowledge, tumbling down, commingled with disinformation, then the plan is working.
Any reproduction, transmission or broadcast without the specific written consent of the fictitious creator is a complete waste of completely good energy. You might be eating ice cream and having fun with the benefit of consolation meals.
If you’re allergic to Fauntleroy and Flossy or any of the substances found in Fauntleroy and Flossy, cease reading and seek the advice of your insider buying and selling partner, graft central consultant or your personal cash laundering service.
Supporter L.L.Bean said “to Boycott is unAmerican”
Only consumption is American.M. Name
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sendingAuthormckbirdbks 10 months in the past from Emerald Wells, Simply off the crossroads,Texas
Hi there cam8510 we’re going to have to learn to giggle. We’re also going to need to look at who we’re as a Nation. It does not appear like the illustration in Washington shares the common believes.
Chris Mills 10 months in the past from Missoula, Montana at the least till March 2018
Mike, I wish the actual deal was as entertaining and funny as your satire. But I feel we’re going to have to be taught to laugh it off for a while until somebody comes up with a greater answer.
Hello Genna – wishing you a peaceful Sunday. You might be proper, that yelling at one another is not going to get us anywhere. The “Yell them down” concept will not be new, but has been delivered to the forefront in current history. The speaking heads do it on a regular basis, just keep speaking over anybody else to ‘achieve the floor’ which they now have the flooring.
The country is in a dangerous place. We are removed from the conventional madness of politics.
Thank you for reminding all of us that there’s room in our discourse for a civil exchange of ideas.
Howdy snakeslane. “He” has our attention now. Thanks for taking the time to learn my comedian presentations of a serious situation. “Clearly unqualified” is how he will go down in historical past, if there may be any U.S. history left.
Genna East 10 months in the past from Massachusetts, USA
I simply wished to take a moment to share one thing with everyone. I’m at all times puzzled and a bit of saddened when using detrimental “the left” labels pop up in anger, as if on automatic pilot, every time someone criticizes Mr. Trump or makes enjoyable of him. (Were these the same people who distributed the likeness of President Obama with a Hitler-like mustache, yelled that he was an Arab/Muslim and touted that birther foolishness ) I do know Republicans, Independents like myself, and Democrats who’re dismayed with the POTUS, and worry the place this country is headed on account of his actions. It’s not about “the left versus the proper,” or “us versus them” — it is about concern for Americans and residents of the world. Perhaps it might assist to maintain issues in better perspective and fewer volatile if they stored in mind that seventy four% of all eligible voters throughout this country did not vote for Mr. Trump.
Glad Sunday, everyone. 🙂
Verlie Burroughs 10 months in the past from Canada
Good day Mike, I’ve simply now read all of your Fauntleroy tales and that i want to congratulate you for taking this on. There shouldn’t be a day goes by that ‘The Donald’ does not enter my consciousness. He’s omnipotent! It looks like our world has morphed right into a Batman movie. Dark days ahead!
Authormckbirdbks 10 months in the past from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas
Whats up Sha – This country has made a mistake. Suppose knocking the marmalade jar off the counter. In shock we watch it falling however it’s going to soon hit the ground and that’s after we should deal with the mess.
Shauna L Bowling 10 months in the past from Central Florida
Mike, I couldn’t assist however consider this collection the opposite evening as I watched Trump’s interview. That is so close to reality it’s scary.
Howdy Genna – The funniest thing I’ve see this week is, ‘Bikers For Trump’ that just about tells me all I have to know. It’s a shame actually with all the mounting evidence towards the guy that he continues to be headed for the oval workplace. This week I learn that the Russians helps finance his campaign. This appears increasingly more like a coup.
Have a protected week.
Genna East eleven months ago from Massachusetts, USA
Invoice and Mike…I understand how you are feeling. The variety of protesters in DC is predicted to exceed 200,000 this week. That’s fairly a document. This does not embrace protests which might be scheduled to take place across the country. Attendance on the inauguration is estimated to be lower than half of what it was when Obama took the oath again in 2008. I will not watch it. I just can’t. I really like my country and respect the Oval Office. But this man is not my president — and i by no means thought I might say such a factor during my lifetime. Ever.
Have an excellent week, everyone. And keep the religion. 🙂
Hello Bill, I won’t be watching the inauguration. I’m advised the factor to do is flip the Television on, however not Trump information. He’s all about rankings. It is usually believed he ought to obtain low rankings for his first nonfiction efficiency of his profession.
Invoice Holland 11 months in the past from Olympia, WA
I’m torn between watching this coming Friday to see what a train wreck seems to be like, or to disregard it in a non-public protest. I have four days to resolve. 🙂 In the meantime, I am going to wish that actual life was as amusing as this sequence.
Authormckbirdbks eleven months ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas
Howdy mar – Sure, it’s not stunning that actual life is an imitation of Fauntleroy and Flossy . haha With a population of 330 million, it is extremely unlikely that 96 million of us are unemployed. It’s a McCarthyism sort of statement. We should brace ourselves for rather more of that in the coming days.
At least I received Pink Floyd right. (once more haha)
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